Shop. Rest. Shop. Rest.

I had to go to the mall today. I used to enjoy buying things (not shopping, buying things); I liked carrying bags and parcels. Especially during the Christmas season, people would seem so joyous and pleasant.

I had to buy clothes. Dress clothes. Buying clothes is not particularly enjoyable anymore for a couple of reasons. First of all, there's my size. I'm about 15 pounds heavier than I would like to be, and I don't like buying clothes anymore because I think nothing looks good. Second, the sheer exertion of it.

As much as I buy online, I haven't crossed over to really buying clothes. I just don't care for buying clothes online for myself. I'm still pretty fussy about how things feel., and you never know if the item is going to run true to size. I might buy a sweater or something, but not jeans. Or dress clothes.

Which is why I found myself at the mall on a sunny Monday morning.

I went to two stores. Two stores. I drove from one to the other. By the time I was finished in the second store, I was done. I still needed shoes, but neither store had any that caught my eye. As much as I wanted to keep pushing and find shoes, I knew better. I went home instead. And sat. Had some coffee. I did absolutely nothing. And I needed every second of rest.

The next few days are going to be very, very difficult.

Last week, I lost a dear uncle. Saturday night, I lost another dear uncle. Two uncles in less than a week.

We all know what emotional stress does a body. Multiply that exponentially when someone has an auto-immune disease.

I don't imagine I'll be doing much writing these next few days, so don't be alarmed (or too happy) if you don't see my posts.