NOT a List of What Not to Say to Someone With a Chronic Disease

I've read, and even posted some of those lists “What Not to Say to...”

Today I read one that really struck a chord with me, and I thought, “Wow, do I sound like that?” If I do, I am so sorry.

We chronic illness people aren't always whiny, I promise you. If I am insulted when you mean well, it's my fault, not yours. When you say, “You don't look sick”, it's true. I really don't. I just am. On any given day, my reaction might range from laughter to tears. It just depends on the day. And it's not your fault; it's my disease. Some days I can cope with it better than others.

If you are genuinely concerned and offer some remedy you heard about, I will listen. Heck, I may even try it. I really do want to feel better, not bask in the realm of “I'm sick”.

Do I wish more people understood the disease? Yes, I suppose I do. The fact remains that despite living in a geographic area that is a perfect storm (for whatever reason) for autoimmune diseases many people are unaware. Nearly everyone I talk to knows someone (else) who has some type of autoimmune disease. No one knows why it's so common here, but it is. Despite knowing someone who has an autoimmune disease, many people know very little any given disease.

While I can't promise not to snap when I hear that I don't look sick, or I should try some voodoo cocktail, I will do my best to remember that you are sincerely trying to help. I will try to remember that you aren't being rude and thoughtless, as these lists seem to imply, but you truly have my best interests at heart because you love me. At least, that's what I choose to believe.